so sentimental
not sentimental, no

i adore skins so much.
i find people who dont adore it
are either people who do not drink or smoke or any of that
but it captures something so organic and amazing and enviable i think

i used to wear an "emily" bracelette around my wrist to remind me to try and be lovely like her

bitter in waking, too attatched to the intangible and vivid memories of dreams! recalling fleeting moments of realisation, only to be ignored and passed between the pages of subconcious this and that
i thnk i have realised that there is only ordinary
and i am bowing out of the race for anothers heart
because we are never happy, even when we get the things we want
and i am sick of being heart sick
and full of wit and worry

i am going into hybernation
and i dont expect to ever want to leave the house again
which may be problematic
since i can nevr have company over

we will never fufil those plans we made i guess

and noone ever takes the time
to take the effort
to show those who are so distant
how they care
or how TO care

a small photo update. sometimes if fell that lensy sort of heart beat in me, but not always.

i have been thinking on the biblical sort of side of fiction lately. not in a very religious way, more like an outside observer perhaps. but there is some very lovely art to do with those sorts of old tails

to do list:
watch new skins tommorow night
wear more cardigans and get bigger glasses
have a crafternoon to make felt lil badgies. monogramed hearts
buy http://www.zazzle.com/bad_angels_gustave_dore_tshirt-235789090996229854

i am stuck in this house
i am sitting upon
and i have all these thoughts
that feel so misplaced in a nest not my own
and perhaps it is wrong to feel like you must contextualise such things
to be in a space to worn and well known
but i miss my walls and familiar posts and poles.
and these things do not feel the same.

my deer friend sammy gave me a sweet singing lullaby cd from lil scout
which is the band of a girl i used to know so well,
laura k,
and it seems like such a strange happenstance to be given such a thing by someone whom i adore so much now
about a friend whom i used to adore so much then
the space between us seems so far
and i feel like there is too much distance
between whom i used to be
and whom is wearing this skin and bones now


you are the kind
whom i adore

i wish there were more conveniently placed
sweet and sultry hollows
within one might enjoy a few shots

--

its very unfair that being eloquent with words is smething that requires practise
why cant i just be lazy like all things
and remian eternally graceful

these are some of my most favourite editorial style photographs. my friend pat has achievable ambitions of taking photos like this one day, which i think about often because it will undoubtedly and most regretably take him places much further away then this one.











i have bean quite absent of late. sleeping under covers even though the night is hot and unforgiving! working for things i probably dont need. lusting after things that are undeserving and unlikely.